Molly is so focused on directing a school recital that she doesn’t realize that another teacher is hitting on her; Vince talks Mike into an unusual money-making scheme.
With Molly out of town for a teacher’s conference, a lonely Mike turns to junk food for solace. Meanwhile, James delivers some sad news to Carl, which leads Carl to consider leaving Chicago.
Molly joins Victoria and her junior-college friends on a spring-fling getaway, while Mike works the Captain for some overtime assignments to earn some extra cash.
Wannabe-parent Mike takes a crash course in male fertility and heads to a clinic to ensure that he’s potent enough to make a mother out of Molly. Meanwhile, Vince starts a job as a door-to-door vacuum-cleaner salesman.
Everyone is shocked when Victoria agrees to be Harry’s date for Valentine’s Day; Carl thinks he and Samuel will be able to meet women at the laundromat.